Firecracker

 From an early age, I was fascinated with fire. I loved watching things burn. Mom had other ideas.

On a camping trip when I was nine, it rained and all our gear got soaked, including the matches. I convinced Mom to let me have them because they wouldn’t light. Once the matches dried out, they lit just fine. But Mom caught me and took them back.

When I was thirteen, I got my hands on some firecrackers, which were illegal where we lived. I thought it would be neat to light the fuse and cut it with scissors, like they do in cartoons.

I decided to try it in the bathroom. Yes. The bathroom. But I wasn’t going to let the firecracker explode.

The fuse was much to fast to cut or stop or even drop. The explosion stung my fingers, and four thoughts flashed through my mind:

1. That was the loudest sound I’ve ever heard!

2. That might be the last sound I ever hear.

3. I bet Mom heard that.

4. I am so dead!

Mom was out in the yard and, somehow, she didn’t hear it. As far as I know, she never found out. I’ve done a lot of dumb things since then, but I never tried that trick again.

An Advent Meditation

God, be merciful to me, a sinner.

I have judged my brother, and not myself.

I have more goods than I can use, but I want even more.

I have been quick to anger, and slow to forgive, even cultivating resentment.

I have coveted my neighbor’s house, his car, and his job.

When I have all I need, I look for new desires.

I have followed too much the devices and desires of my own stomach.

I’ve been slack in my work, but neglected proper rest.

I’ve grown comfortable with my sin. When I should have called in an airstrike, I negotiated a truce, and even took up arms for the enemies of my soul.

The King is coming, and I am afraid. Afraid of not having enough, not doing enough, and not being enough. Afraid that, although I repent and confess now, when I am tempted again, I will likely sin again because, in that moment, it will seem so reasonable.

“O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death?”

“Comfort, comfort my people, says your God. Speak tenderly to Jerusalem, and cry to her that her warfare is ended, that her iniquity is pardoned, that she has received from the Lord's hand double for all her sins.”

The king comes, not to judge, but to liberate. “The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners.”

The Lord does not ask the merely difficult, He asks the impossible. “In other words, fallen man is not simply an imperfect creature who needs improvement: he is a rebel who must lay down his arms.” 

We are fighting a two-front war. We cannot win; our only choice is this: To which side will we surrender? Lord, when we are tempted, bring us to our knees. 

“But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”

Amen